Today it occurred to me I live by my own set of self imposed laws in order to keep me in line. Following my rules keeps me happy.
Rule no. 1) Don’t get a ‘swirl’ of anything on your food and certainly don’t pile salami, bacon and ham on top of one another.
And some more
2)Never drink alcohol before 6
3) Always get a good nights sleep
4) Exercise every day
5) Only have one coffee
6) Be helpful and polite
7) Never say no
8) Be busy
9) Don’t be overweight
10) Do yoga every day
11) Don’t procrastinate
12) Don’t be late
13) Don’t be wasteful
14) Don’t use too much plastic
15) Don’t eat noisily especially with your mouth open
16) Don’t combine apples and tea
And on and on
These rules just piled up on me one after another and I realised something about myself. I’m pretty hard on myself because if I break any of the above then I feel like I have failed.
We all have our own set of self imposed restrictions about how we should live our life. These serve their purpose from time to time but being so restrictive is also a form of control. If we expect this much of ourselves it is likely we expect it of others as well. Then we step into judgement like I did tonight. ( Oh MG I can’t believe that person just got that in their sandwich, what is wrong with them?) Hoping others will follow your rules isn’t a fast path to happiness after all.
Judgement is a problem. When we expect things to be a certain way and we observe the opposite then we step into judgement.
My teacher says to me ‘Gab, why do you want the world to be a certain way?’
Practice for today: See how long you can go without judging someone who hasn’t lived up to your set of rules. It could be their hair color, the way they eat, their slowness, anything. Just starting with observation of how many times you judge others in a negative way is a very grand start indeed.